10 Conversations On Racism I’m Sick Of Having With White People
Note from a site editor: As of today (12/18/11), comments are closed on this piece. It’s simply gotten too tiresome to moderate subtly as well as overtly racist, anti-Black “go back to Africa/Black people are prejudiced/we’re all one race/your tone isn’t nice so I won’t hear your point/only Black people complain [so there's no racism], etc.” comments. This site has many good articles you are welcome to comment on. This one is just trollbait and we have a lot of other site work to do. Sorry.
The following are 10 conversations that I would be happy never to have with white peepul ever, ever, ever again. While there are countless others, these are at least 10 that I’m forced to endure far too often.
This has been touched on before, but as sure as the sun will rise, whenever POCs are sharing their views or experiences on being on the receiving end bigotry and denigration, too often the default white response is something shallow and patronizing along the lines of, “Racism is just bad. Racism is so stupid.”
Really? Thank you Mr.-States-The-Obvious. Do you have any idea how condescending that sounds? Talk about adding insult to injury. That would be like someone going up to a mugging victim and telling them, “Stealing is just so wrong. Stealing is so bad. People shouldn’t rob other people at gunpoint. That’s just….naughty.”
I don’t need a pat on the head and be told what I already know. What I do need is for white folks to lecture OTHER white folks on how racism is stupid and bad, wrong and oh so naughty. What I need is for white folks to do is tell their racist cousin why it’s fucked up for them to hold a racial grudge against all Asians because their grandfather fought in Vietnam.
What I need other white folks to do is remind other white people that Arabs and Muslims were ALSO victims of 9/11.
How about doing that.
2) You Should Stay And Fight For Change
As a POC and an LGBTQ, I’m treated as 3/5 of a human being in this country, on a good day. Living in the Southeast, well….a lot of people are especially bitter about that Civil Rights business.
Too often when I express a desire to relocate above the Mason Dixon line to an area where bigotry is at least tolerable (for me, the next POC’s mileage may vary for valid reasons), or move to another country where I can actually marry who I want or not get treated like a pariah for having brown skin, I can count on some speshul white person lecturing me on why I’m under obligation to stay in an area I would sooner see nuked from existence than reside in.
“But Neo, there were black people who stayed and fought for change after slavery ended!”
Yes they did. And God bless them for it. And I’m not taking anyway from their contributions and sacrifices. Obviously their mileage varies. But POCs are not the Borg. There were also plenty of POCs who headed up north and out west for better opportunities. That isn’t to say there wasn’t bigotry and fail up north and out west but as far as lesser of the two evils go, it was the preferable choice. Because people conveniently forget that for those who stayed behind, they also had to contend with Reconstruction, Jim Crowe, the Klan, Tuskegee, the pushback for Civil Rights, Jena 6, church burnings during the 90s and 2000s, do I even need to continue?
I don’t need to be told where I’m under obligation to stay and fight. I’m intelligent enough to decide that for myself.
If speshul liberal white folks feel that strongly that I should stay and fight for change, why don’t they do the heavy lifting and actually do it so I won’t feel the need to flee like Lot. Why don’t they make dismantling institutional oppression, a top priority or for that matter, a priority.
Because to be lectured about why I should stay and fight for change in a place by privileged peoples who aren’t facing the same bigotry or denigration, comes across as immensely disingenuous and very suspect.
3) I Don’t SEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE Race!!!!!
Oh yes, this one is a classic. The discussion of racism comes about, those of the Caucasian persuasion have to profess how colorblind they are and how race doesn’t matter to them at all.
Now to be fair, I can see how this trips up otherwise well-meaning and good-hearted white folks. They recognize that racism is wrong (and this puts them ahead of many) and genuinely believe that they are treating people equally and not allowing race to be a factor in their dealings with others. And God bless them for that. They’re at least on the right track.
However, we’re don’t live in a colorblind, post-racial society. I wish to God we did. The institutional oppression that is racism is immensely prevalent and ignoring the problems and the issues will not make them go away.
A lot of people believe that if you ignore racism or don’t talk about it, it’ll vanish. But when Racefail pops off again, we’re all scratching our heads wondering why we’re still dealing with this nonsense.
So yes, continue to judge people on the content of their character and not their ethnicity but also be cognizant of the realities that too many of us face and those realities is that we live in a very racist and hateful society and do your part to change it.
4) Being Expected To Take It
Stop me if this sounds familiar.
“Ho hum Neo, that’s just the way So&So is. And they’re not going to change, so you’re just going to have to accept how they treat you, even if it is demeaning. And you know, do it with a smile.”
“Well Neo, that’s just the way things are, yes we live in the land of freedom and democracy and equality but you’re going to be discriminated against. You just have to accept it. And you know, do it with a smile.”
Ummm…….fuck you? *smiles*
Anyone who thinks I’m obligated to simply take racism or being denigrated clearly doesn’t respect me as a human being and clearly not someone who is worth my time. And anyone who even suggests that I should put up with that crap, isn’t someone worth my time either. If you don’t tolerate being treated like a subhuman by others, you don’t get to qualify that for me and others.
Rather than demanding POCs to simply take it or “rise above”, why don’t white folks start shutting down bigots and demand them to stop acting like entitled demented sociopaths. Because if you harbor hatred towards someone because of their ethnicity, you’re a fucking sociopath. How about that for a change? And the fact that I’m having to take the time to explain why as a human being I shouldn’t have to put up with being insulted and demeaned and should be treated on equal footing as white people…..um….again….fuck you?
*smiles*
5) Conflating Racism For Classism
One of the most common tactics racist white folks will use to avoid getting checked on their privilege is conflating racism for classism as witnessed in this episode of bitchassness here. If they had it their way, they would have you believe that blacks were enslaved and endured Jim Crowe solely because they were poor and if they had enough money then they wouldn’t have to worry about bigotry or oppression.
Yes, these two often intersect, yes they often overlap. But racism and classism are two distinct issues. If it was simply about wealth and class, then Henry Louis Gates, a world renowned Harvard professor wouldn’t have been racially profiled and arrested by the police for entering his own home nor would there have been a coverup over the police report.
Barack Obama, another Ivy League educated black man and oh yeah president of the United States (and arguably the most powerful man in the world) has been on the receiving end of nonstop racist attacks. Now, if he’s enduring this level of racism (people still don’t believe he’s an American) from society, what chance does the rest of us have? Those of us who don’t have his resources, who don’t have the media watching our every move?
Yes, poor white immigrants and poor white people have suffered and do suffer and it is a legitimate issue that deserves to be addressed. No one’s disputing that. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. realized this and often reached out to poor white people. Because classism is an injustice, I don’t care what race you are. But it is not the same as racism. They have completely different dynamics at play. Both are legitimate but you can’t use the former to erase/dismiss/negate the latter.
So this whole mindset of I’m poor ergo I know alllllll about racism or have it just as bad or even worse than POCs is dead on arrival.
6) Erasing Racism From Racial Issues
Oh this is another failing that can especially be found among liberal anti-oppressionist white peepul. It’s no secret that when it comes bigotry, racism typically takes a backseat to these discussions. Bring up racism and racial issues and you can count on being shouted down with everyone tacking on ever other oppression, they’re personally invested in just to get out of dealing with their white privilege/white guilt.
Which by the by in regards to the concept of privilege, for those of you who have issue with the concept, READ THIS HERE.
In fact recently when I called out the racism that a WOC endured, I had some condescending white chick demand that I take white privilege out of the discussion.
Yes there is a thing as intersectionality. As a double minority, I’m acquainted with that concept quite well and this isn’t to say that other oppressions aren’t legitimate or don’t deserve attention, because they most certainly do.
But sometimes, it is about race. And sometimes, scratch that, often, white folks need to be reminded of that fact. Especially the self-proclaimed liberal white allies with a Miss Millie complex who suddenly think simply because they’ve read an essay or a blog entry written by a POC that the rules don’t apply to them.
7) Prove It To Me
A common ploy by conservative white people. Whenever racism is brought up and POCs share their perspective and their experiences, they demand proof. They like to set themselves up as Judge and God and we have the burden of proof.
“Prove to me that racism is real. Convince me. And if I don’t believe it, then it didn’t happen and it’s all in your head.”
And it doesn’t matter how many facts, figures, statistics, essays, dissertations, you could have Jesus Christ himself come down from heaven to testify and they still wouldn’t believe you.
So of course when you deem yourself their equal and not play their game of white supremacy circle jerk, suddenly they’re having a conniption. Because how dare you not grant them an audience or waste your time on them. How dare you think your opinion and experiences or more valid than whatever bass ackwards idea they’ve pulled from their rectum.
I’ve heard this argument too many times (especially from self-proclaimed liberal white peepul), that I don’t engage people who disagree with me because my brain can’t fathom the idea that someone may have a different or *gasps* opposing view. Because in the near three decades I’ve lived on this planet, I’ve never encountered anyone who disagrees with me. Yes being a black gay man in the South, I’ve never come across any opposition regarding my orientation or my race and have had to defend myself. Also apparently it’s written somewhere that I’m under obligation to engage, entertain, and be talked down to by any pissant who trolls my blog.
Or the common, “You just have a problem with my political beliefs.”
Asshole, I’m not a political view, I’m a goddamn human being. And fuck you for getting mad and taking exception to the fact that I have problem with someone believing I should be discriminated against. And if you have a problem with my contention with said issue, then it’s YOU who can’t agree with someone who disagrees with YOU!
I know the score, these folks aren’t on here to exchange ideas or to have a good faith discussion. They get off on seeing minorities angry and upset. That’s why they spew the bile they do online. So when you know the score and ignore them, that’s why they get pissed off because that lowly colored person just took their mighty whitey power away from them.
Because how dare I make the determination that some (white) folks aren’t worthy of my time and how dare I ignore them and go on with my life without allowing them stress me. How dare I not grant them an audience or waste my time on them. But this goes back to our bodies, minds, and our times not belonging to us any longer.
Being all uppity.
An outrage! An outrage I tell you!!!!!!
8) I’m Really Not The Angry Militant POC You Think I Am
I’m usually scratching my head on this one but apparently calling out white folks on their racism and we’re talking in the most polite tone possible = me being a rabid seething angry black man.
It both amuses and befuddles me how often I see some broad drowning in white woman tears attempting to pull a Rosewood bawwwwwing about how angreeee I am.
“HE WAS SOOOOOO MEAN TO ME. I’VE NEVER SEEN SOMEONE SO FUELED WITH ANGER. HE WAS LIKE AN UBER RED LANTERN. HIS ANGER WAS BLISTERING MY PORCELAIN SKIN. I DON’T UNDERSTAND WHY THE MEAN NEGRO SAVAGE WAS BEING SO MEAN AND NEGRO AND SAVAGE. OH GODDESS, HELP ME. I’M SOOOOOO OH-PARESSSED.”
I’ll grant you that a lot of you mistake nice for soft but seriously white folks, I’m not the Militant POC that keeps you awake at night. The fact that you think I’m one just proves that you haven’t met a real Militant. While it’s true that I can certainly hold my own against the best of them, especially if my hand is forced and my back is to the wall, let’s be real here for a second, I’m a clean cut hipster black comic book nerd who regularly uses four syllable SAT vocab terms and stuff.
I make Will Smith and one Burton Guster look raw and gangsta. Of course most of you think Obama is too angry and militant and too dangerous, so I guess I’m in good company.
*shrugs shoulders*
You better hope that I’m the most militant POC, you ever have to deal with because I’ve got brothers and sisters who will really give you something to cry about.
9) Self-Esteem Negates All Racism
Despite claims to the contrary in the previous point, this one WILL send me on a violent rampage.
I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve been white-cited that I just shouldn’t care what others think and I should feel good about me regardless. Because feeling good about myself is all that matters.
It’s not unlike the other lecture I get too often. I should just stop fretting over racism and just live my life. Because clearly I can take a day off from bigotry and racism whenever I feel like it. Basically setting up the fallacious argument that racism is the resultant of low self-esteem or having a chip on your shoulder.
Variations of this bile can also be found in the form of “Racism is dead, and if POCs aren’t prospering, it’s because they can’t get their acts together.”
This is one of the problems I had with this Sesame Street video. I agree with Keeni84 in that yes it’s doing a lot of good for many young black girls and for that I’m eternally grateful. However, since the video has gone viral, the media has conflated the issue about this being a case that black women are ashamed of their hair simply because they have low self-esteem about who they are.
Riiiiiiiiiiiight, black girls are ashamed of their hair simply and their skin and their bodies only because they have low self-esteem. Because it’s certainly not as if we live in a Eurocentric culture that props up all things of the caucasian persuasion as the end-all-be-all standard of excellence. It’s not like we live in a society where black women lose their jobs on television (Look up Judge Ephraim from Divorce Court) or from corporate positions for wearing their hair too “ethnic.” So it’s not as if black women can simply wear their hair natural in this society and not catch hell for it. Let’s not forget it, it wasn’t that long ago when Don Imus called a group of young black women a bunch of nappy-headed hoes and was actually defended.
Furthermore it’s a catch-22. If you wear your hair straight, then you’re aspiring to be white. If you wear your hair natural, you’re being militant or granola or anything else than you choosing to express who you are in the manner you see fit for you.
Good self-esteem is not going to stop a bank from denying me a business loan because the bank rep has a grudge against black people. Good self-esteem isn’t going to Arabs and Muslims from being unjustly attacked by hateful racist mobs. Good self-esteem isn’t going to protect blacks and Latinos from being racially profiled and brutally assaulted by crooked cops.
Being a POC with great self-esteem does not negate racism. In fact, quite the opposite, it incites it.
Try being a POC who has enough self-esteem to work hard in school and earn straight A’s and see how much hell you catch for it. Try being a POC who is articulate, well-dressed and mannerable and see how often you get accused of aspiring to be white. Try being a POC who has enough self esteem in yourself to politely call out folks for committing racist acts and see how much rebuke you catch. Try being a POC who has enough self-esteem to demand to be treated with the same dignity and respect as your white peers or refuses to adhere to racist stereotypes and see how many times you get accused of being “uppity.”
POCs aren’t supposed to feel good about ourselves. We’re supposed to be self-hating, killing and murdering each other off, playing the role as the source of mainstream society’s fears/fetish/and ethnic entertainment. We’re supposed to be subhuman savages.
This all to say that when it comes to racism, having wonderful self-esteem will catch you unholy hell if you’re a POC.
10) Racism Is Not Happening In A Vacuum
To those of you who genuinely don’t understand why racism still exists or why people have such attitudes, or didn’t realize that racism was still a problem, the only thing I can simply ask is where the fuck have you been for the last 400 years.
Do you think it’s random happenstance that it took until the 21st century before we even entertained the notion of having a black president? Ask yourself how many POC dramas are on television? Hell ask yourself how many television series are on television where the POC is the lead protagonist and it’s NOT a sitcom and/or minstrel show? If we’re in such a post-racial society, explain to me how many commercials have you seen on television that features interracial couples? Probably for the same reason there was such a public outcry over NFL star Terrell Owens doing the Desperate Housewives spoof with Nicolette Sheridan.
In short, read this here and then come talk to me about how we’re living in a post-racial society.
So what are conversations I would love to have with white people?
I’m glad you asked.
The following are good-faith discussions I love having with white people. Conversations I have with my friends and readers and one of the many reasons why they’re the most awesome people on the planet.
1) Hey Neo, do you have any recommendations for resources. I’m really wanting to broaden my horizons but I want to make sure I get the right information.
2) I’m trying to contend with a relative/boss/co-worker who is quite a bigot because I don’t think it’s right for me to stay silent and do nothing. How should I proceed Neo?
3) We’re tired of POCs doing the heavy lifting in battling racism and we realize that erasing racism is just as much our responsibility (if not moreso) as it is POCs. We’re looking to launch a few protests and campaigns. How do you think we should proceed?
4) I’m trying to expose my child to other exceptional minority media which showcases and celebrates POCs in a positive light. Do you have any suggestions?
5) Hey Neo, I’m writing a story where the primary protagonist is a POC but I want to handle the character with respect and I realize that I don’t have the insight of being a POC because well….I’m white. You’re an excellent writer and a very intelligent guy. Could you have a gander and let me know what you think about the characterization and the story in general?
Here’s to less of the former and more of the latter. K? Thanks.
- Neo-Prodigy
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- A MESSAGE FROM AN EDITOR TO RACIST WHITES: IF YOU CAN’T TAKE THE TRUTH THEN STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM US NIGGERS!!!
- White Racism, White Supremacy, White Privilege and the Social Construction of Race
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Neo .. could you please contact me? I left the following to be directed to you..
on Sun, Aug 21, 2011 at 4:01 PM, Michael Harrington wrote:
Message body:
I AM tired of POCs doing the heavy lifting in battling racism and I realize that erasing racism is just as much MY responsibility (if not moreso) as it is POCs. I AM looking to launch a few protests and campaigns. How do you think I should proceed?
Please.. can I contact Neo to invite her to be a part of a film we are producing on War and Racism and Capitalism.. -Michael
I am have noticed the pressure in the black community I live in, if your not black, your not in with us. We as human beings (I noticed) like to be part of a group, we come together and see eye to eye more often if it is a group that has a cause, a part of being. If I’m not black, I’m not good enough-well anyway, that’s what I’ve been experiencing. Some could say, well that’s good, now she can feel what I feel. Once I’ve been introduced I am very well liked, but for the black culture, I have noticed this trend. Does the black culture in order to get ahead want to go in this direction? Do you think this is not happening? Sometimes, I have gone through something hard, but I’m glad for it, it makes me the person I am today, but if you give someone anything and everything they want, what would they really do with it?
Wow Neo, thanks so much for this article. I am a white woman in Australia & heard about your blog in a workshop about white privilege. I often feel stuck in my guilt and not sure what i can do or say without sounding like a condescending white biatch.
I think there are still so many white people who dont get the concept of white privilege. Its pretty darn invisible – thats the whole problem. Even if a white person doesn’t consider themselves a racist, they still posses privileges that POCs dont have. Refusing to acknowledge this is a form of imbedded institutionalised racism. But I believe education can overcome this (in many cases).
Im sad to say Australia still has a massive amount of systematic & institutionalised racism in our society, but I wont stop challenging people and systems on it – ever.
Solidarity.
@ thepete
I am just wondering why you feel that Obama’s election would make any difference to race/racism in America. I’ve never heard anything about the other 42 presidents and the cause they lead to eradicate racism, in fact some of them were downright hostile to black people and black people’s interest. I can only surmise that you believe that racism is a black problem, when the reverse is true.
1966, Floyd J. McCree was the first African American to elected mayor of Flint, MI – Did that end racism in Flint then?
In 1967 Carl B. Stokes was the first African American to be elected mayor of Cleveland. Do think that ended racism in Cleveland then?
There were other first for African Americans being elected to this office (mayoralty) Harold Washington, Chicago, David Dinkins, New York City, Coleman Young, Detroit, Maynard H. Jackson Jr, Atlanta, Tom Bradley, Los Angeles and two governorships (Massachusetts & Virginia). You cannot tell me that racism was eradicated in those jurisdictions, simply due to the fact, that in an election, these individuals received he plurality of the votes?
I just wish that you and those of your ilk would consider these things before you lay the race eradication at the feet of black politicians, and especially this president.
What are you doing on that front?
@ Kuwasi Balagoon
“HE WAS SOOOOOO MEAN TO ME. I’VE NEVER SEEN SOMEONE SO FUELED WITH ANGER,” AND I’D THROW IN “HATE, CONDESCENSION AND MISTRUST”. HE WAS LIKE AN UBER WHITE LANTERN. HIS ANGER WAS BLISTERING MY EBONY SKIN. I DON’T UNDERSTAND WHY THE MEAN WHITE OPPRESSOR WAS BEING SO MEAN AND WHITE AND OPPRESSIVE. OH GODDESS, HELP ME. I’M SOOOOOO OH-PARESSSED.”
You’d be surprise how many POC would say – “Goodness, he finally got.”
Have you ever tried talking to an individual about a certain matter and the response is usually the same? “I don’t believe you. Stop making up things, after all, we live in the same society and that as never been my experience.”
I’m a white woman.
I think what you’re saying is extremely important, but calling a woman a “broad” (and then elaborating on that in a pretty demeaning way) in a post dedicated to confronting oppression is hypocritical. How do you expect to convince people of different races and backgrounds to support and empower each other when you too use belittling language?
wow,that was the most condescending pile of mouth-die i have heard in a quick minute..ARA fights nazi on the daily and 97% of them are whities,crackers,the man,what ever you racial slur you can throw at the “white” race…rod coranado said anyone can be white..its their attitude and approach to others that give them white mentality.thus said being a dick makes you white..im chickasaw and mississippi choctaw,and jicarilla apache and russian-german jew,ive beat up more for being a jew and looking like a “fag” than just getting my ass kicked by a bigger dude…but white jews dont count as an opressed minority because all jews are zionist and have their hands in investment banking?just like all white activist are retards who have never looked at the status of their privledge or its effect on communities…i look for the anarchism and the organization against a never ending world war against muslims,the poor,other whites,blacks,etc etc etc.i dont see it.maybe the destruction of millions of muslims dont matter to you but it does to me,there are far more things to discuss and take a stand and fight against than crimethinc and other white activists,i mean seriously slutwalks and things that white people cant say?are you that ineffective that this is what you would rather discuss than maybe we need to organize a food not bombs in our community,or get the pigs from killing or beat POC daily,how can we organize with others while keeping our autonomy as POC?maybe the war hasnt hit home yet for you and urgency of organization isnt a priority for but its for ALL ANARCHISTS.i know APOC who are not A.P.O.C because of the language used on this website…read the HAJJ conversion of al-hajj malik al-shabazz and learn we have one struggle to fight and we need to fight it…but i cant saw i know what the POC community goes through because i cant…i only live there,but i can sit with ex-black radicals who converted to islam because of the semantic masturbation of the left and who want to organize as one…may peace be upon you and your families
Gee, i guess you and i won’t be conversing much.
but…um…good luck with the pundit thing.
I guess my biggest problem is I’ve never really thought of myself as a “white person,” and the term just has connotations that are…maybe not offensive per se, but definitely inflammatory. The town I grew up in is 75% Hispanic/Latino, and the first several hundred times I heard the word “white” as a way to describe me, nothing positive or even neutral was meant.
And as such, I’ve never really considered it to be a part of my self-identity. On the whole, I really just think of myself as a “person,” even though there are a great deal of adjectives I could put in front of it.
I *totally* get (at least I think I do) that it colors, pardon the pun, how the world sees me and that if I just think of a “person” my mental picture will be a little bit exclusionary. I’m reminded of a line from the movie “A Time to Kill” – Samuel L Jackson says to Matthew McConaughey “When you look at me, you don’t see a man. You see a *black* man. [...] No matter how you see me, you see me as different.” And I am 1,000% guilty of that. But that’s just culture and upbringing, honestly. Does Jackson see a “man” when he looks at McConaughey, or a “*white* man” ? I lack the perspective to know and wouldn’t presume to guess.
This is a lot to think about.
The problem with all of the anti-racism POC stuff is that it assumes that ALL POC’s have experience racism and experience it all the time. It does not take into account that there are possibly whites who have been discriminated against because of the color of their skin more so than some POC’s.
And, you will NEVER convince a majority of whites to become more conscious about fighting racism if you use resentful overtones (and don’t deny you are using them, because you and I both certainly know that you are!) and tell them that no matter what they do, they can’t make up the “privilege” (which, like above, you make the assumption that their skin has given them a privilege) they have. And saying “we don’t want you to feel guilty, we just want you to understand!” will not make people feel better about what you have said. Many more whites would be willing to engage in anti-racist activism if they weren’t told that they are different based on the fact that they have the skin color of those who have power. And you may think it’s giving in and appealing to the white man, but your current methods are obviously instilling hostility and more ignorance. Some may listen, but only a minority. A kinder and more inclusive method would definitely gather more support.
I agree, I was expecting you to be harder on us white lefties, but you have to be right of center to really be offended. In the 80′s it was hip for a while for white-leftists to admit their racism, which was really only admiting that white-privledge existed for them. It had it’s own problems, mostly that it was done as a way of ego-boosting and getting laid. The POC caucus in the group I was in asked them to stop doing it, especially applauding after, because it creaped them out. The point was though, white-privileged does exist, it is organized into the fabric of society, as is racism. Those who were born under it will have to struggle our whole lives, and even after “the revolution,” racism and sexism will have to be fought. The first form, worker’s control, is only the beginning of the revolution, the form through which, but continuous revolutions and the rising of new forms of power based in self-determination, the remaining menaces of the old society will be destroyed. It is not an excuse to ignore the needs of POC and Women, as was done in the past. This same debate is beginning in the General Assemblies at the occupations, where Women and POC are being told they should not raise demands until after we have taken control back from the banks.
It is incredible to see the excuses and denial for white people. Why waste your time writing a comment when it is clear you do not get it and probably will never get it. Listen to what people of color are saying, their experience is the result of your inability to see the truth. Wake up, you will be soon less than 50% of the US population and will be living in a country with more than 50% feel resentment about your white behavior.
@Alexandra –
There is a legitimate historical, biological basis for the lack of resonance that “being white” holds for you, Alexandra. I claim– and celebrate– my Finnish-American heritage, but “white” is not a label I accept. Despite what others may try to foist upon us “race” is a man-made illusion. See: http://www.pbs.org/race/000_General/000_00-Home.htm
Racism is a fail. Call me stupid or ignorant, but without all the politically correct terms and equivocations, race is overrated. Maybe the racism she’s talking about is black’s in the states, but as a minority(non-ashkenaz Jewish) myself, my family has faced many types of racism in our host country. Try being a minority within a minority and it even gets worse. I am extremely anti-patriotic and completely against racism. I think the whole frikin world is obsessed with race that’s why there is racism in the first place. We created it. When God or whoever you believe created us, made us with different colours of skin,it wasn’t for us to segregate people. I dont wanna ruin the fun of comedy for everyone, but let’s be honest racially based comedy like Sarah Silverman’s makes more of you guys laugh than non-racial ones. Comedy and TV sort of opened the doors for stereotype during post-slavery times. Growing up in a remote part of Canada, I noticed kids would start making mexican jokes even though they’ve never met a mexican in their lives besides going to mexico for Christmas break. But because they saw american tv shows like family guy that’s their first knowledge of a person of that nationality. People just give waaayyyy too much power to race. IF it was just colour, no one would be making stereotypes. But because we have given frikin colour so much power.People hire and don’t hire people based on what’s been SAID about this colour or that colour. Let me tell you all something that you probably won’t fully accept until you’ve reached the bitterness level I have about race and nationality: there is no fukin point on discussing race or nationality and how to prevent discrimination based on it. The only solution is when people realize it’s just a colour. The blacks in america are bitter because of the majority of their socio-economic status’ have been put low because of the shadows of slavery and the whites are trying to make up for it by being “open-minded” OR they’re like “screw this shit, I’m done apologizing it’s not like they’re progressing, i’m gonna be proud of my non-existing aryan roots and shave my head and to top it all of i’ll wear a swastika to be a rebel even though it’s one the symbols of Hinduism o yea im so cool” And the blacks use this reason to create their own mini supremacy thing. Just terrible. In general as a society, racism has grabbed everyone by the horns and it’s all hopeless. BUT as an individual, we can “change” stereotypes we can be what the world doesn’t want us to be. It sounds all hippy, but unfortunately it’s the truth lol
Stop saying “white folk”, makes you just as guilty sir. Accept EVERYONE, not just yourself.
overall thoughts – discrimination is a fact of life if you any living thing on this planet
and if you want to really get intellectual none of it really matters because we are all part of one thing from a physics perspective we just see ourselves as separate entity’s
take waves for example
they we percieve them to be distinctly different when infact they are all part of the same motion using the same particles.
do you treat your pet dog as an equal?
no . you dont drag your partner round by a chain round the neck or castrate them do you ? but you would feel perfectly justified to do it to a dog
nothing is equal and it never will be …………………………….
in response to no 1 racism isnt bad infact its good because it is everyones right to have an oppinion whether you agree with them or not
in response to no 2 how and why are privileged people going to fight for you when you wont fight for your self especially on something that doesnt affect their life
in response to no 3 everyone sees different races as different because they are (on a visual level on a genetic level and on the level of personality and social aspects )some people just dont accept it
in response to no 4 by classing yourself as a poc and them as the terrible white tyrants instead of just two humans with different opportunity’s you yourself are projecting your own inequality they just pick it up and run with it.
jews are considered by many to be white but they are not treated as equal so dont be fooled into think white people like white people any more than they do anyone else
and the jews have been persecuted longer than any other ethnic group going back to before they were kicked out by the Egyptians
so yes you should take it and try to educate them if you really want the world to change, as they wont educate themselves on these subjects because they are too privileged too be affected
in response to no 5 classism and racism they are the same because they both fundementally undermine they other person on something that is not determined by their choice ……
you didnt choose to be black
he didnt choose to be poor
she didnt choose to be white
thats life……
in response to no 6 it is not about race it is about equality between all humans irrespective of ethnicity,gender,religion or any other and you obviously have failed to grasp the concept of every person being equal
in response to no 7 it exists
in response to no 8 i agree you not a millitant your a person with an opinion
in response to no 9 self esteem/self respect has nothing to do with anything other than the person
correct me if im wrong! muhammed ali was both black and full of self esteem
as is samuel l jackson,dr dre,morgan freeman,nelson mandela to name but a few
if you think pride is about nationality or colour your wrong
in response to no 10 400 hundred years hmm
i refer you simply to a quote by an old jew “You’re talking to the wrong white man, my friend. My people were the white man’s nigger when yours were still painting their faces and chasing zebras”
also http://www.informationclearinghouse.info/article21449.htm
thats my opinion and you wont change it so come back in 1600 years and if your still being persecuted youll only be about 2000 years behind where the jews are now
well said bob
also where would this website be without racism ….
it like all groups aimed at helping any persecuted group would fall apart and be completely redundant if racism didnt exist and then youd have to find something else to bitch about.
Gustavo the keylogger guy :I use this function but i forget that is an API and doesn’t have help in Delphi, i wanted to know if the function returns any value and yes returns a boolean value.Thank you
@Penelope –
Point taken, sister. We women of all colors need to stick together. Men of all races are sexist and men of all races are brutalizing women, and sometimes even gay men brutalize women or behave in a sexist way. But I think that Neo made a lot of good points. Solidarity. <3
Excuse me, this is somewhat random, but I just have to say this:
WHY ARE THERE ALWAYS ONE OR TWO OR THREE VEGAN/VEGETARIANS AROUND TO MAKE THIS SHIT ABOUT VEGETARIANISM??? WE’RE NOT TALKING ABOUT FOOD RIGHT NOW!!! LET’S LEARN HOW TO TREAT HUMAN BEINGS LIKE HUMAN BEINGS, AND *THEN* WE’LL TALK ABOUT ANIMALS!
That is all.
it’s the moral responsibility of the group holding the most power to keep its members from oppressing people in groups holding less power.
Thus, just as ALL white people are responsible for ending racism, ALL men are responsible for stopping male violence against women. Violent men must stop assaulting women. Non-violent men must not sit by and allow male violence against women to continue. The same goes for white racism. To allow racism and sexism to continue is to condone it. Their inaction-or indifference-is passive male violence against women and passive racism.
Silence is complicity.
Would you be willing to answer questions 1-4 that you posed at the end of your article? I’m interested in your ideas, especially resources that you would recommend. Thank you.
Amazing piece of writing. Great stuff. Should be required reading for a whole heckuvalotta folks what don’t Get It. Thank you!
I’m a so-called Native American. A frustrating area for me is the inevitable confusion of many white folks when they assume their westernism, notions of modernity and their racism are somehow separate.
I happen to be a white woman and I agree with most of what you said. I have seen racism first hand against some of my freinds and I get angry over it and do speak out against to anyone who acts that way and I take offence to you lumping all white people together, it shows YOUR racism, you know racism isn’t jsut white on black, plus I take offense to you calling me a part of the “priviledged” class. I grew up in the slums and had to work my way through college by working 40 hours a week during the day and going to school at night because I, as a White person did not qualify for any financial assistance (partly because I didn’t have my parents SSN in order to prove financial need and then because I wasn’t a “minority”. I grew up with 7 brothers and sisters living in a 2 bedroom apt, and then couldn’t get ANY financial assistance for college, and it offends me that you call me priveliedged just because I’m white. I do agree that racism exists and it angers me because as MLK said, we should be judged by the content of our character not the color of our skin and he meant EVERYONE not just black people!!
Hmm, in all fairness, if I were to write an article like “10 Conversations I’m Sick of Having with Black People”, I’d probably be bombarded with black protesters accusing me of being racist.
If I actually wrote that article, they would probably be right. It was an interesting read, I’ll give you that. The common rants of a racist black woman. I don’t understand how you can be mad at white racists if you are predjudice yourself. I also don’t understand why most of your audience is white and why they are giving pitty upon you.
@Dick Butkis -
I hated this article. I thought it was lazy and your tone was really whiny and patronising.
And no I don’t expect you not to be whiny if that’s how you feel. I’m not saying suck up and play nice and be a good POC (cringey American term if ever I heard one). Do what you want, if your goal is venting.
But if your goal is actually trying to effect positive change of any kind (which, to be fair I don’t think it is) this article a complete fail.
NOBODY ever wants to be lectured by anyone who’s patronising and whiny. I’m sure you don’t (and you pretty much say so). I know I don’t.
If you genuinely want people to engage with you, try being less bitter. Regardless of whether you ‘should have to’, it would help your cause a lot.
ditto. thank you
Very interesting post.
“People of Color Organize does not subscribe to the myth that all races have the ability to exert racists actions.”
This is simply a denial of the definition of the word “racist.”
Racism is the belief that people of different races are different. Race being a set of phenotypic characteristics that generally make up a social construct of a group or population of a certain size.
Racism is stupid because there is no more normative scientific difference between people of different skin color than the two families that live across the street. Two different “races” are just two different, very large families.
This is not a trivial point. Much of America harbors racist sentiments, and much of America does not believe in or understand evolution, genetics, and the scientific process. There is a connection between the two.
If “People of Color Organize!” wants to define “racism” as the actions taken by privileged members of the majority to oppress POC, well, that’s obviously their choice.
But it’s an ignorant and counter-productive one.
Ironic that this post concerns the rules of conversation; POCO needs to rethink their own.
i dont think you got the point of this article at all.
In reading this blog and the comments that follow, I am reminded of a quote I heard a very long time ago while working towards becoming a teacher. I can never perfectly reproduce the quote, but it struck me in the most eye-opening way and so I would like to paraphrase it here: In order to undo 300+ years of social injustice, we must provide 300+ years of privilege (equal injustice in the opposite direction). No white person wants to hear this. I consider myself a progressive white woman, and this makes me uncomfortable. Deep down, though, I know it to be true. I don’t mind being lumped into the mass of white people, because I am a member of the mass of white people. I purposefully hold onto my privilege and tightly clench it to my chest because it terrifies me to lose it. It terrifies me to have to endure the life of a POC. I will never, ever, do enough to even the playing field for those that endure injustice, though that doesn’t mean I should try.
My point: Don’t whine about how a person that endures injustice lumps a privileged group into a single mass. Be grateful that you’re in that privileged mass and then try to do something about the fact that he/she is not.
@V –
I don’t think you got the point of my post at all.
WOW! I feel like I just read an article, IN PART, written by someone from PETA who just through paint on a fur coat to make a point. Point won’t be made when you just isolated your audience into not listening to what you have to say purely by its delivery.
Having said that of course many good points are made. But please don’t use the last 400 years of human existence as a reference go back further and you will see slavery existed well before “white” people enslaved people. Also the sad fact is it was other “black” people who sold them into slavery as well. LET ME MAKE THIS CLEAR I AM NOT SAYING SLAVERY OR RACISM IS ACCEPTABLE IN ANY FORM FROM ANYONE. But unfortunately you come across as a racist in the way you present your article and present “white” people as a whole and as if they created slavery. Doesn’t really matter who did, but it was NOT white people, just matters that slavery IN EVERY FORM needs to end. Slavery comes in many forms and ALL people are affected by it. Just look into human trafficking as one example.
There is racism, prejudice, and ignorance and I have fought against them all. And I will say I DO NOT SEE IN COLOR AS FAR AS HOW I TREAT SOMEONE OR WHAT I THINK OF THEM. I SEE PEOPLE AS A RACE YES A HUMAN RACE. I grew up in HUD housing as pretty much a “minority” and I LOVED it. I learned so much about life and other cultures and frankly I miss being in a multi-cultural environment. Growing up I read books, not the bible at that time, about humans throughout history that taught life-lessons. My favorite ones were Jackie Robinson and Helen Keller.
Believe it or not some “white” people have disadvantages as well. I had to fight a stereotypical she’s white, rich and privileged. NOPE WRONG! I do NOT pretend to understand racism FOR ALL CULTURES or what other face. I DO say my peace when others make remarks I disagree with whether it racist or just plain stupid jokes. I have had many other obstacles as well, not only based on my race, but based on my “class”. But this isn’t about me and no one want to hear a “white” person complain. Good points can be made when you do focus on class because it’s NOT just one group of people who fall under the “lower” class, “upper” class etc.
We are all one HUMAN race. We are privileged to have a world full of different nationalities and cultures we can all learn wonderful things from each other. Frankly the American race has lost much of what is important. Loving everyone, family and friends. I can quote John Lennon, MLK, Eminem and many others. But I won’t for time and space. I have a page on Facebook, Quotes For Humanity, and I do that there.
D.R. Congo is mentioned somewhere. Yet, what is NOT mentioned what the rebels are doing to the local civilians. And they are black NOT white. Hurting others simply because they can. The sick things that are happening to men, women, and children. I just did a presentation about it in class not to long ago. It’s heartbreaking. Not to mention is it ALL around the world not just isolated to D.R. Congo. Do you have any idea how many child soldiers there are around the world and in how many countries?
Imagine was a wonderful song by Lennon and the message of love and peace WORLD WIDE. I don’t consider myself a citizen of America (and yes that brings on all the anti-american or not patriotic comments I ignore). I am a citizen of the world.
Again, some good points are made but could have been made better and more effective and helped many more people if the focus was not just about what “white” people do because ALL people can be racist. But it did give me time to, for a few minutes, not focus on the fact that my father was just murdered by his “girlfriend” a few weeks ago. Yes he was “white” (German, French, English to be more precise) and NO she was NOT neither was she “black”. What I will miss most is my Dad calling me his little hippie girl who was going to save the world.
Moving to Florida was a culture shock and it can be racist. I hear more North is even worse. Which I have a hard time with. So I do what I can in a peaceful and loving way to set a good example and speak-up for what I believe in.
I don’t care what anyone thinks of me. The only people who matter are those I love and my family and friends (extended family~which I don’t need to point out are mostly non~”white” but I will). I was just one the phone recently with my “second” dad, who happens to be “black” talking about how we missed the old days and how simple our lives were and how we never saw anyone or anything in “color” as you put it. I talked about how I felt privileged growing up where I did in California in the “low” class and multi-cultural. Because I have what money can’t buy. A life full of love and friendships, “family” who would do anything for me as I would them. Who helped and I helped overcome whatever came our way. That’s priceless.
I had to say something, maybe this is the wrong forum, but speak for everyone around the world NOT just one race, and just maybe this world will be united one day. Be part of the solution NOT the problem. Instead of negatively venting about what you can’t stand to hear in a somewhat racist way try communicating so others want to listen to and respect what you have to say. Forget the “just get over it” that doesn’t work. Try rising above the rest, setting a good example, doing onto others as you wish them to do unto you.
“When the power of LOVE overcomes the love of power the world will know PEACE.”~Jimi Hendrix
“You must be the change you wish to see in the world”~paraphrasing Gandhi
@UmNope -
My reply way not meant for @UmNope. At first I couldn’t figure out how to reply to this article. Sorry I’m not computer literate with blogs and such.
First reaction from the radical lesbian days of yore as well as anything else going on in America today: I can’t believe how little has changed for women, lesbians, and the black struggle. Forgive me if I need forgiveness.
And at this point in life after envying black women forever I will just always see you as goddesses.
Just to clarify as well, it doesn’t matter what “race” my Dad’s murderer was she was an evil person period. He had friends all around the world because of his business who are all mourning his death. It makes me proud to know my Dad also didn’t care about anything but the fact that you are human.
I also feel pity for people who are racist and/or extremist or who feel the need to apologize for the color of their skin. You miss out on the significance of life and the opportunities you have to make the world a better place and change the world one person at a time. One Love One World~Bob Marley
Hi. I have a question. I am a white conservative who does not want to be seen as racist. I hope I am not. How do I talk about my dislike of Liberal Politics like those practiced by Obama and the Democratic Party without being racist?
Ha! I have been working on an essay with the working title “White People, You’re Embarrassing Me,” and have hit on a few of these points. If it’s any consolation, I offend (some) white people as much as you seem to have here, and I am one of them.
so i am bad because i am white?
i am racist because i am white
i hate blacks people because i am white?
i don’t deserve what i have because i am white?
i do not get it
Interesting rant…..except for the end when you say you’re going to list discussions you like to have, and then proceed to list what kinds of advice you like to be asked for. Last time I checked, giving advice or relaying how correct your opinion is and having a discussion weren’t the same.
Awesome a million thank yous.
Just shut the fuck up and stop being a crybaby. Go to work for a privat csector company. Be yourself and shut the fuck up. You are boring.
OMG! I L.O.V.E. YOU!! Thank you.
you do realize that it’s not just white people that bring these points up, right? Many ‘POC’ will make some of these points as well. I see a decent amount of what would be termed a ‘racist attitude’ in here if it were directed at a person of color, but since it’s directed at those aweful misguided white people it’s totally ok I guess : /
As a person of color who has done a lot of traveling in our world, I know that racism can be (and is often) found in people of all ethnic backgrounds, and in all parts of the world (not that you really have to be either of those things to realize that). I’d rather not perpetuate more of it by acting like it’s only the white people…
Annnnd I just realized that this sounds kind of terrible! :) I just meant there’s no way to address this stuff and avoid a shitstorm. Which of course you already knew, so I will rephrase as “Good job!”
@nana – No, but apparently you’re just not allowed to have an opinion on race if you’re white. Because if you’re colored are of a race which means people can’t be racist, but if you’re white you have no race so it’s impossible for anyone to be racist against you or for you to know what that’s like.
People of color are allowed to bring up these conversations, but we don’t want to have them with white people anymore! LOL
And if you couldn’t tell !!
Emily, I am a white person, and, as such, not the best authority on this. However, I do know what it is like to be a white person not wanting to be a racist. My primary advice to you is accept the fact that you are racist and go from there.
I have been granted honorary black person status, given the ghetto pass, whatever you want to call it, and I catch myself doing and/or saying ignorant things every single day (even on this thread). If you are going to enter the arena of racial politics at all, you have to deal with the fact that you are going to humiliate yourself a fair amount. There is no real way around this that I can see, at least not in my experience.
As for being conservative, that’s an even harder position to take. Because you are allied with all the old white racists in the country (google Southern Strategy), and because one of the things white people tend to want to conserve is their own privilege. If you wonder whether one of your positions is racist, seek out black opinions. And please, please respect the fact that black people are able to determine what is best for themselves and their communities (not brainwashed or dependent), and also what is or is not racist.
Cheers!
You know, it’s incredibly hypocritical to write a piece on racism that is targeting a particular race in its criticism.